It seems like the same issues have been floating around in my head, the same questions that I put on paper in the first few weeks I was here. I would almost feel like I am just recycling old journal entries but I hope that some of these words help to convey the tumultuous torrent of thoughts raging around in my head daily. The topic of privilege rears its head at least once everyday.

We had strolled in on Arabic time, roughly 30 minutes or so from when we were scheduled to be at the Catholic Action gym in Bethlehem. Arabic time reminds me of Guatemalan time, the atmosphere just a little more laid back. It was my second game on the floor coaching the Ibdaa girl's basketball team. The game itself was a bit of a battle and though the girls took a long time getting over their intimidation of the bigger, stronger team from Al-amal, they played well. I even came close to getting my first technical foul when, in an effort to make the girls relax but also to protest a terrible call, I jumped off the bench and yelled in a mix of Arabic and English at one of the ref's. I guess it was a good thing that he didn't understand English since he just used both hands to make the calm down and sit down motion to me.

While the game was good as the girls learned more about playing defense and working through a bit of the jitters, they had a string of hard luck and many of their shots did not fall. But it was after the match that again privilege came up. My mother, who at the time was staying with her group in Bethlehem, had walked up from her hotel to see the game. When she had visited Ibdaa a week ago she met Areej who is one of the basketball players and so Areej walked over after the game to greet her. My mother asked if she would see Areej again before she left. Areej and I both said probably not but then my mom offhandedly mentioned that maybe Areej could come see them in Jerusalem before her departure. Areej and I exchanged a look and waited one moment before my mom figured out what she had just said. Areej cannot go to Jerusalem; she does not have that privilege, even though she lives 10 minutes away. I have mentioned this before in my writings.

I have not traveled as much as I thought I would since arriving here three months ago and I think that there is another reason behind why I have chosen not to do this even though I have the privilege. It relates to the feelings I get when I talk to my friends here and we talk about the fact that they can't travel freely in this area. In a strange way its like I feel that I am in solidarity with them by not exercising my privilege and going into Jerusalem and Israel unless I need to. While some may question if this makes any sense, why not exercise my ability to travel and see more of the country while I am in the area, I cant overlook the feeling that comes over me when I mention going to Jerusalem or other parts of this country let alone the world that my friends here cant travel to at all or without a huge hassle.

Maybe you can see the jumble of thoughts in my head right now.

A fire just erupted out front of the center; someone lit one of the huge four dumpsters that serve as the entire garbage service for the camp. It got out of control, the flames leaping up and coming dangerously close to lighting the pine trees in front of the UN building on fire. The Ibdaa bus was also close to the flames and people poured out of the center along with the driver to get it out of the way and see the fire. The fire truck just showed up and doused the flames.

Condoleezza Rice made a visit to Bethlehem yesterday, apparently to see first hand the suffering on this side of the WALL. I am curios as to how her few hours here went since she only went a few minutes form the WALL to the Nativity Church and then met with prominent Palestinians in the bourgeois Intercontinental Hotel. I wonder what she really saw in that time.